A flippant comment was bought to my attention from last nights episode of ‘Britain’s Got More Talent’.
During an interview in a Black Cab between David Walliams and Stephen Mulhern the following conversation took place:
Stephen Mulhern: You must be over the moon about the baby, will there be only one?
David Walliams: We’re gonna have this baby, if we like it we’ll keep it, if not we’ll put it up for adoption.
You can imagine the outrage this flippant comment has caused in the adoption world. Adopted children who watched were left wondering if they were taken in to care because their birth parents ‘didn’t like them’ or if they’ll be returned to care because their new family ‘doesn’t like them’ or worse still, that they’re ‘unlikable’, what will happen to them if someone doesn’t ‘like them’.
You may think these thoughts are totally irrational, but for our children, with their low self esteem and their damaged view of the world around them, these thoughts are perfectly rational and perfectly capable of planting the seed of doubt in the ‘secure’ ‘loved’ ‘worthy’ image that we as adoptive parents work so hard to instil in our children.
I’ve no doubt that Mr Walliams didn’t intentionally make this comment to be hurtful, he’s an author of some lovely childrens books after all, so he must be passionate about childrens lives and their imaginations. So you think he would know better!
Perhaps the world has closed its eyes to the seriousness of adoption, and lasting effects of trauma and neglect on children. Adoption in its self is a wonderful thing, but the circumstances that led to that child being adopted in the first place is more often than not a horrific story of neglect and abuse, this story, this history, it stays with that child for the rest of their lives. Being adopted isn’t a ‘fix’ and it certainly isn’t a joke.
To make light of ‘adoption’ with such a flippant comment, is to make light of the atrocities that adopted children have endured!
We need to educate those around us with what adoption really looks and feels like, and those around us need to listen!
Another disgraceful adoption comment has been bought to my attention. In the 12 rated Walt Disney film ‘Avengers Assemble’ Directed by Joss Whedon Thor justify’s his brother Loki’s bad behaviour by saying ‘he’s adopted’. So are adopted people bad then? I’m outraged!
Have you come across any derogatory comments related to adoption made by celebrity’s or in films? Share them here!