Plan P

Published November 14, 2012 by thefamilyof5

Yes we’re up to plan P now, well it feels like it, plan A was a joke, plan B pointless, plan C a waste of time etc etc so we’re on to plan P.

P is for prevention and it seems the only way to stop middle girl waking baby girl is to prevent her being able to.

The placing authority’s only advice was that we surrender our bedroom to middle girl and hubby and I sleep in the lounge. How they think he’s going to be able to function at work after having had an awful nights sleep every night I’ll never know, idiots!

We took camhs advice last night and we brought middle girl down stairs early this morning with the promise of a DS for entertainment, she was ‘ok’ about this arrangement we thought, that was until we discovered that she’d already woke baby girl before we got her up, some 30-45 minutes earlier. So it seems her determination to wake baby girl is far out weighing anything else.

So we’re on to plan p. Tonight and for the foreseeable future, she will be sleeping on the floor on a make shift bed in our bedroom. No longer is our marital bedroom a private haven for hubby and I to relax and chat about our day and unwind before drifting off to sleep, its now somewhere we have to share with a difficult child, our daughter.

None of our girls have ever slept in our bed or even in our room its just not something I’m particularly comfortable with, perhaps if they were or had been babies when they came home, I’d feel differently. Our bed is just that, OUR bed and I really like it that way. Its going to be difficult, awkward and uncomfortable and I doubt any of us will feel relaxed or get much sleep, but we’re out of options!

Bedtime is going to result in screaming and crying and temper tantrums (from me as well as middle girl too), wish us luck!

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4 comments on “Plan P

  • I very much understand your stance on keeping your bedroom a haven, a kid-free environment. We had the baby with us until my hubby’s brother moved out, and that very day we moved them around and reclaimed our bedroom. She never would have been with us had the space been available from the beginning. That’s how I like it – others can disagree but I know right where you are coming from.
    That being said, I think you are doing the right thing. It is a lot that parents sacrifice for their children, but it will pass. This is not a permanent deal, but a solution for a temporary problem – hopefully it will help and you’ll be able to reclaim your room too in a few months. You’ll definitely need to take a few weekends away with your hubby, though – it’s important to keep your relationship strong both for the girls and for yourselves. Good luck!

    • Weekends away? What are those then? Hee hee we’ve had 2 nights to our self in 2.5 years and probably about 10 evenings out.
      I have to say, I hated sharing my room more than I thought I would. I felt like a stroppy teen and wanted to stamp my feet and shout ‘its not fair’. I guess if she was in my room because she was sick, had a bad dream etc it would be different, but instead she’s in my room because she cannot and will not behave and we’ve run out of options.
      Thanks for your kind words, you’ve so much going on your self right now so its kind of you to take the time to support me. I read your blog every time you write, I’ve shed many a tear for you recently too, I just don’t always have the time to comment, but please know that Im reading it though 🙂

  • It is different because he is a baby but we had Baby Spouse in with us till he was 6 months old (which is the recommended length of time for safety). But it felt better because it was for safety – we were keeping him safe – perhaps you can see it like that (and we knew it was temporary too – again will it help to see it like that?)

    If she does manage to behave a bit better, perhaps you could move back to “plan move downstairs at an early hour”. When I’ve had groups of children to get to sleep and one is determined to keep the others awake I’ve sat with that one and the choice is read a book or sit quietly and be bored (though I have to sit with them – which isn’t going to work for you). Would she read to herself at all?

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