Wednesday I decided that my baby girl needed some ‘Mommy Time’. So I kept her off school.
I was expecting protests from her and whining about missing playtime, P.E, not having her milk or snack but she didn’t, in fact quite the opposite. She was ecstatic. We dropped her sisters at school and she proudly told everyone we passed ‘I not going to school today’.
So we hit the shops, she chatted and giggled and chatted some more, in fact, she didn’t shut up the entire day she was clearly having a lovely time with Mommy and Mommy was having a lovely time with her. We had some lunch, (she chose lunch in a supermarket cafe over the pub or Mcdonalds!!) and then she asked if we could go home and have a duddle(cuddle) on the sofa before her sisters came home. It was really a lovely day and I feel it was what she needed to break the downward spiral she’d gotten herself in to.
I started to notice quite early in the day that her need for ‘control’ was still very prominent. Comments like ‘we came here cause I chose it didn’t I’
‘your buying that (picnic blanket?!) cause I like it arnt you’
‘we’ve got this trolly cause its the one I wanted’
‘Give it to me so I can put it in the trolly’
‘I’ll tell you what to buy’
‘I want to leave my car door open’
‘That’s what I was going to say’
‘That’s what I was going to do’
‘I want to pay’
‘You need to drive that way’
‘Are you going the right way’
‘I’ve crossed my legs cause I choosed to didn’t I’
‘It was my choice not to go to school wasn’t it, cause I didn’t want to’
‘You opened the door cause I wanted you to didn’t you’
‘I didn’t want to open that so you did it for me didn’t you’
So whilst she didn’t throw herself on the floor and strop every 5 minutes, in fact she was lovely all day, it was still very apparent that she liked to feel that she was in control of everything.
But I guess when you’ve had no control of the major decisions in your life and haven’t been able to choose who you love and who you leave, where you live and where you don’t, your going to want to make those small decisions like opening and closing a door, because how else can you have a say otherwise.